An Indepth Look Into A Geek's Soul

So yeah, if you guys don't want to hear me be mean to myself, leave now.

Being all caught up in this whole "Year of the Jon" thing has just gotten me into one giant clusterfuck.  Me and my cocky attitude has blown right back in my face.  I should have known that it was going to.  It's not who I am.  I'm some stupid little guy pretending to be something he's not.  I'm not some cool, suave, sophisticated stud.  I'm just some loser of a geek who sits at home all day thinking of new DnD characters or how to put together a new Magic deck.  No wonder I can't get a damn girlfriend.  What kind of normal person would want me?  No one, that's who.  I'm just going to die alone, but fuck, what else is new?

Hell, I can't even win a damn match of bowling anymore.  I've won what?  Maybe 5 out of the last 25 games that I've played?  Pathetic.  What happened to the days when I could beat Collin with both my hands tied behind my back?  It's like he gets better every week and I just stay in this same old suckfest that I've been in since I left Maryland.  I was terrible back then, and I'm terrible now.

And yeah, to Carlee, I fucked up.  I highly doubt you are reading this, but I'm really sorry for everything that happened today.  I wish I could take it back.  What I said was really stupid, and I'm sorry if Carlo is giving you a hard time.  I'll just try to stay out of both of your guys's ways.  I'll just hunker down in my corner and let you guys pass by me.  Sorry for being an amoral jerk.

Peace Out.